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Management Hygiene Exposé:
I recently went on a four-day training course (the course was in Software Project Management - not that it has
any bearing on this story, but detail to me is like the icing on the cake. Just call me Mr Anal...)
All very useful. I learned a lot - in particular, never trust a bowl of peppermints
(the round, marble-sized ones which roll impressively if a bowl full of them is tipped over). Why, you may ask?
Could something as innocent as a bowl of mints really not be trusted?
Here's the horrific truth. During one of the regular ten-minute breaks, I dutifully
went to the "little boy's room" (such typically English coyness!) to take a leak. I washed my hands,
and whilst drying them with one of those crappily ineffective warm-air driers, I saw one of the other attendees
step out of a "Number Two Cubicle" (amidst a haze of asphyxiating pooiness), and leave the washroom without even washing his hands! Yuck.
But that's not the end of it. I had given up with the oddly named "hand drier",
so wiped my hands dry on my trousers, and followed "poo man" back to the lecture room.
On a table just inside the entrance was an array of coffee cups, pitchers, and
(shock, horror) a bowl of mints. To my open horror, "poo man" suddenly plunged his unwashed hand deep
into the bowl, and scooped out a handful of mints. He allowed most of them to roll off the palm of his hand and
land back in the bowl, and made his way calmly to his seat with his two selected peppermints.
When I confronted him about his actions, he seemed oddly dismissive, and steadfastly
refused to see the error of his ways. I guess that makes him a madman, probably criminally insane: his perception
of reality is so distorted that he cannot tell right from wrong. And this man is a project manager in training.
Go figure...
So let that be a lesson to you all - never, ever trust a bowl of peppermints!
Talkback: Have Your Say!
Do you have any manager/hygiene horror stories of your own? Why not post a message here...
Post a new message
Message Index: Interesting story, though not at all uncommon.
Prefer to be anonymous OK, try this...
Dean Webb deanwebb@zzzptm.com Scary
Larry Fetid breath
Sniffer
Would you drink it?
Rob Oates
Would you seek revenge?
Anon art@g.com
Love
Oates
I fart in your general direction
Hector hektor45@hotmail.com
The Messages: Interesting story, though not at all uncommon.
In the USA, bars often put small trays of nuts out. Never eat them!
A survey found traces of urine on most nuts in most bars, due to the fact that many men donīt wash their hands after the toilet.
I mean, you can probably get away without washing hands after a number 1 when you are a skinny well scrubbed kid and had a bath yesterday, but not if you are a fully grown male with fully developed sweat glands.
And certainly never after number 2s! Even for kids!
My father used to work for the local council, and on a train trip spotted the Councillor in charge of Health and Hospitals (or something like that).
The guy picked his nose continuously throughout the entire journey, apart from a trip to the toilet where my dad noticed the shortness of time between flushing and the guy emerging. My dad was flabbergasted that this was the guy in charge of the publicīs health!
The problem is so wide spread that some food companies put the washbasins outside the toilets. Anybody emerging and not seen to wash their hands faces instant on-the-spot dismissal. And it is enforced!
Your tales of software management are all too familiar. Non-technical people see it as some sort of flexible magic substance that can be produced like natural gas to be squeezed into whatever container desired, rather than a complex product thousands of times more complex than a swiss watch.
Prefer to be anonymous
Not sure where exactly, UK
Sun Jul 29 14:43:42 EDT 2001
OK, try this...
Imagine a manager of the opposite gender giving you an unrequested backrub with said icky hands.
<raises hand>
Victim. Right here.
</raises hand>
She was thoroughly repulsive in every way and only became more so after I filed the grievance with HR.
Dean Webb deanwebb@zzzptm.com
Hellacious Acres, USA
Tue Jul 31 12:14:19 EDT 2001
Scary
Count yourself lucky - least it wasnīt a manager of the same gender!!
Larry
somewhere, USA
Wed Aug 01 05:46:15 EDT 2001
Fetid breath
I knew at least one manager who suffered from extreme halitosis. You could smell him approaching from the other end of the room. Yack!
Sniffer
UK
Sun Aug 19 14:56:27 EDT 2001
Would you drink it?
The water cooler is in another part of the office, so the team has a large glass water jug that gets filled up and shared around.
Our manager often comes up for a chat, whilst heīs chatting he fondles the water jug rubbing the inside surface of the spout and leaving greasy thumb prints where the water comes out.
Can anybody explain this behaviour?
Rob Oates
UK
Wed Sep 19 08:41:40 EDT 2001
Would you seek revenge?
If your team leader posted some things on the Internet from you would you get revenge or let it lie?
Anon art@g.com
UK
Wed Sep 19 09:11:08 EDT 2001
Love
How do you tell one of your team mates that you feel for him? me being a bloke n all? Clive if your listening....
Oates
UK
Wed Sep 19 09:13:17 EDT 2001
I fart in your general direction
I have dropped a wee bit of "wee" into co-workers soda.
payback, biatch!
Hector hektor45@hotmail.com
Washongton,DC, USA
Thu Sep 20 21:07:08 EDT 2001
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